Thursday, September 29, 2011

October Meeting: Passionate Marriage

Our book for October is: "Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy alive in committed relationships" by David Schnarch.  This is a book unlike one we've read in the past and should provide for interesting discussion about marriage and relationships in our next book club meeting.

A brief description from the authors website (

In PASSIONATE MARRIAGE: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships, he makes available to the general public his highly successful and untraditional approach to sex and marital therapy. He reveals how a passionate sex life requires each person to face the anxiety of defining himself/herself while getting closer to their partner, a process he calls differentiation.

Differentiation involves changing the way we think about marriage: Instead of seeing it as the merging of two people into one, as has often been taught, we must learn to maintain a sense of ourselves as distinct from our partner in order to become closer to him/her. Gaining more differentiation is not easy-and Dr. David warns that any "expert" who promises Eros and intimacy in ten easy steps should not be trusted. Sexual encounters provide perfect opportunities to differentiate and develop the strength to love deeply.

Mixing humor and compassion, Dr. David describes couples' explicit sexual encounters and dramatic therapy sessions to demonstrate how they found personal, marital, and sexual fulfillment far greater than they ever dreamed possible. Every sexual exchange, from kissing to daring erotic behaviors, is a graphic picture of how you and your partner feel about yourselves and each other outside the bedroom. He goes beyond simply curing sexual dysfunctions to help people achieve their sexual potential. For some that means the jolt of "wall-socket sex" and experiences of sexual transcendence.

Passionate Marriage offers explicit discussion of sexual behavior, practical tips, and details of couples' going through the "people-growing" crucibles inherent in emotionally committed relationships.

Click this link if you'd like to watch a video interview of Dr. Snarch and a transcript of the interview (I couldn't get it to embed!)

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